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Thinking Makes It So

I've always held the belief that perception is more important than reality. Let me explain.

Faced with the same events and facts, 100 people observing them will somehow manage a very wide range of interpretations based around those events and facts. This is where misunderstandings arise from. People have different predispositions to events that end up colouring how they interpret information.

The important point here is that it is these individual perceptions of reality that determine reaction; therefore emotion and behaviour. Why is this important? Because you have to learn how to deal with this individual's perception rather than the facts as you see them.

The facts as you see them will not help you persuade another person to your point of view by you reinforcing them. You need to hear and feel the other person's perceptions in order to understand how they think, and therefore how best you can persuade them away from their mis-perceptions (as you see them).

The way each individual thinks and analyses information determines their emotions and behaviours - thinking makes it so. Only by addressing and understanding what an individual thinks will you begin to understand their behaviours.

This is also interesting because it means that you can look at any given behaviour and 'see' into a person's thinking - directly into their mind. It can be a bit unnerving to do this. For example, the next time someone deliberately pushes in front of you at the bar, try asking a few internal questions about what exactly is going through this ignoramus's head. Is he a bully who will quickly back down if challenged? Or is he a thug likely to thump you if challenged? Your assessment of the facts is how you think and will therefore determine how you act; and your assessment will have different outcomes.